


silent film stars stuck in talking cinema life

by chameleonmikey



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: M/M, Wrong Number AU, band texts, text au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-10-30
Updated: 2016-08-18
Packaged: 2018-02-23 04:41:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 1,575
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2534552
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chameleonmikey/pseuds/chameleonmikey
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Me:<br/>u like the word asshole</p><p>Unknown:<br/>i do</p><p>Unknown:<br/>asshole</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Unknown:  
why is mr parker such an asshole

Me:   
i dunno why is mr parker such an asshole

Unknown:   
i dunno why hes such an asshole

Unknown:  
thats why im asking you, asshole

Me:  
i dont know any mr parker

Me:  
asshole

Unknown:   
you arent ashton??

Me:  
i dont know an ashton either

Unknown:   
asshole gave me the wrong number

Me:  
u like the word asshole

Unknown:  
i do

Unknown:    
asshole

* * *

 

Unknown:  
mr parker is still an asshole

Me:  
i still dont know mr parker

Me:  
why are you still texting me we covered that i wasnt ashton

Unknown:  
im bored

Unknown:  
and mr parker is an asshole

Unknown:    
im bored in an asshole

Unknown:  
shit

Unknown:  
in a asshole’S CLASS

* * *

 

Unknown:

hi

* * *

 

Me:  
r u in mr parkers class

Unknown:  
LOOK WHO COMES CRAWLING BACK

Unknown:  
I THOUGHT YOU DIED

Me:  
no im alive

Me:  
its just been a week since we texted so if u have a repetitive schedule, youll be in mr parkers class right?

Unknown:  
correct

Unknown:   
and slightly creepy

Me:  
sorry

Unknown:   
u r actually correct. im just not in class. i took day off bc of hangover

Me:  
its wednesday

Unknown:  
WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME

Unknown:  
I DONT EVEN KNOW YOUR NAME

Unknown:  
AND YOU THINK YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO QUESTION MY LIFE CHOICES

Me:  
calum

Unknown:  
HOW DARE YOU

Unknown:  
what

Me:  
my name is calum

Unknown:  
oh

Unknown:  
michael


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Michael:   
> im grtea
> 
> Me:   
> are you sure?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im sorry i had such good ideas for this and it kinda turned out shit

Michael:   
hye calim

Michael:   
hows iit gong

Me:   
michael are you okay?? 

Michael:   
im grtea

Me:   
are you sure? 

\---

Me:   
so you have a pretty nice dick

Me:  
just saying

Michael:   
whAT

Michael:   
CALUM WHAT ARE YOU SAYING

Me:  
you sent me like 5 dick pics last night

Michael:   
shit

Michael:   
I knew I should have gotten ashton to take my phone

Me:   
are you hung over? 

Michael:   
yes

Michael:   
jesus needs to do his job and take the pain away

Me:  
dumbass

Me:   
please dont drunk text me again

Michael:   
thats rude

Me:   
if u drunk texting means dick pics then please dont

Michael:   
you said i have a nice dick

Michael:   
so…..

Me:  
so what??? 

Michael:   
that means you looked at all 5 pics right?

Me:   
weLL

Michael:   
does that mean youre into dick

Me:  
what

Michael:   
if u liked looking at mine does that mnea your into dick? 

Michael:   
ARE YOU GAY

Me:   
im bi

Michael:   
hey same

Michael:   
twinsies

Me:  
okay

Michael:   
im gonna go get an aspirin and make ash take me to mcdonalds or something

Me:   
have fun with your hangover 

Michael:   
bye cal-culator

Me:  
fuck you


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Me:  
> fine fine shhhhh not a creeper
> 
> Michael:  
> r u sure. bc u looked at my dick pics more times than necessary.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im so sorry omfg i didnt realize it was so long since i updated this and im working on a v important and long fic and yeah sorry  
> yell at me on my tumblr chameleonmikey

Me:  
psychology can suck my ass

Michael:  
why tf are u taking psychology

Me:  
i got in on a football scholarship

Me:  
i needed an extra class

Michael:  
so you chsoe psychology

Michael:  
u just made things like 100% harder for yourself

Me:  
its interesting!!

Michael:  
the finals almost killed ashton last semester

Michael:  
no joke

Michael:  
he was paler than me

Me:  
michael

Michael:  
which is huge just like ashton is super tan and im like a porcelain doll

Michael:  
what??

Me:  
youre rambling

Me:  
whats up

Michael:  
its my birthday

Me:  
thats a good thing right

Michael:  
no

Michael:  
im old

Me:  
how old r u

Michael:  
just turned 19

Me:  
thats not old mikey wth

Me:  
i turn 19 too anyway

Me:  
happy birthday

Michael:  
u called me mikey

Me:  
oh shit

Me:  
sorry???

Michael:  
no

Michael:  
i like it

Me:  
oh

Me:  
okay

Michael:  
:)

Me: so does this mean ur in your 1st year

Michael:  
yeah

Michael:  
ashton is in his second tho bc hes super duper old and were only old

Me:  
im in my 1st yr too yay

Me:  
you know

Me:  
we might even have some classes together

Michael:  
nope

Michael:  
not discussing this

Michael:  
what if we figure this out and u turn out 2 be a creeper huh

Michael:  
hUH

Me:  
fine fine shhhhh not a creeper

Michael:  
r u sure. bc u looked at my dick pics more times than necessary. 

Me:  
talk shit get hit mikey

Michael:  
weml

Michael:  
ok ash is dragging me out to this party

Me:  
shit my friend luke is dragging me to one too

Me:  
if i meet anyone called michael i will kiss them

Michael:  
u need 2 be stopped


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Michael:  
> r u saying u go to my school???????????
> 
> Michael:  
> calum dont bullshit me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok im sorry this took me forever. yell at me on tumblr @ chameleonmikey

Me:  
so i didnt meet any michaels at the party

Michael:  
and i didnt meet any cal-ciums

Me:  
i hate u

Michael:   
no u dont

Me:   
……….

Me:  
so like do u think that we were maybe actually at the same party?

Michael:  
i dunno

Michael:  
like

Michael:  
did we ever even establish if we went to the same school or not??

Me:  
dont think so

Michael:  
uni of sydney

Me:  
what

Michael:  
i go to the university of sydney

Me:  
oh

Me:  
guess maybe we could have been at the same party

Michael:  
r u saying u go to my school???????????

Michael:  
calum dont bullshit me

Me:  
yeah i go to university of sydney :))))))

Michael:  
dont know where the party was but

Michael:  
it was at a frat house

Michael:  
there was this one couple who started having sex literally in the middle of the main room

Michael:  
and the cops came at about 2 am

Michael:  
does that help??

Me:  
holy shit

Me:  
i was there!!!!!

Michael:  
did u do anything i could have noticed

Michael:  
-is lowkey freaking out-

Me:  
nah dont think so

Me:  
if i did, i dont remember 

Me:  
i did lose my shirt tho

Michael:  
eh it was a frat house there were lots of nakey guys

Michael:  
very nice very nice ;-)

Me:  
creep

Me:  
maybe we should like….

Michael:  
should like what

Me:  
exchange photos or something

Me:  
so that like

Me:  
now we know were at the asme school

Me:  
if i saw u around

Me:  
i could know it was u

Michael:  
calum

Me:   
and then i could be like 

Me:  
‘hey’

Michael:  
cal-pal

Me:  
what mikey

Michael:  
ur rambling

Me:  
deja vu

Me:  
didnt i say that

Michael:  
yeah

Michael:  
but it was accurate couldnt help myself

Me:  
so wat do u say….. 

Michael:  
no

Me:  
no???

Me:  
oh

Michael:  
sorry just like… i dunno

Michael:  
its hard to explain

Michael:  
and i still dont know if ur a creepy stalker or not ;)))) 

Me:  
okay if it makes u uncomfy then we dont have to see each other

Michael:  
thank u <3 <3 <3 sorry

Me:  
no its fine babe :)) 

Michael:  
babe??? 

Me:   
o shit

Michael:  
its ok honey bun :))))


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> its been SO LONG sorry guys lmao   
> tumblr: fairyfilter

Michael:   
So i made a new friend today

Me:  
Ok? 

Michael:  
Yeah he’s really cute but he has a girlfriend so i guess he’s off the table for me bc i’m too nice to break up a couple

Michael:  
Even tho i could if i wanted to bc i’m hot as hell

Michael:  
Not that u would know

Me:   
Lmao mikey whats ur point

Michael:  
He mentioned his best friend

Michael:  
And his best friend sounds really awesome. He got into school on a football scholarship but is excelling in the classes he’s taking even tho he didnt think he would

Michael:  
His name is luke, ring a bell?

Me:   
Michael

Michael:  
Yeah? 

Me:  
I cant believe you

Michael:  
I promise i didnt go looking for you or anything, we just had to share a booth at the coffee shop because there were no free seats, and he’s really talkative and very nice. Thinks realy highly of you. I dont blame him

Me:  
He didnt show you a photo of me or anything did he?

Michael:  
He offered to lmao. I said i didn’t want to see, respecting your wishes and privacy and all

Michael:  
Even tho it KILLED me to turn that down

Michael:  
Hey u there?

Calum:  
Yeah. just means a lot to me that u didnt look

Michael:  
Why? Why dont u want me to see you? 

Calum:  
Gotta run, talk to you later ok?

Michael:  
Ok cal. Have fun


	6. Chapter 6

Michael:  
I bet ur insanely hot

Me:  
What

Michael:  
You’re just protecting me, bc u know when i see you, i’ll be blinded by how amazingly hot you are

Me:  
That’s not it

Michael:  
Ok

Michael:  
Anyways can we talk about how freaking hot this weather is like killme

Me:  
I’m not talking about the weather with you oh my god

Michael:  
What do u wanna do when you’re older? Play professional football?

Me:  
Uh

Me:  
Yeah i guess. I mean i love football but i also love music like i play the bass and i love to write 

Michael:  
Thats hot. Can i read something you’ve written? Like songs or stories?

Me:   
Both. i share my songs sometimes, but i’ve never ever ever shared my stories with anyone. Ever.

Michael:  
Is that ur way of telling me that i’ll never hear one of your stories?

Me:  
Yeah. sorry babe

Michael:  
Babe?

Me:  
Fuck

Michael:  
;)

Me:  
……. How was class

Michael:  
Lmao it was as good as class can be

Me:  
I dont even know your major

Michael:  
Music

Me:  
Wait really?

Michael:  
Yeah i play guitar and sing and write songs too boo ur not special

Michael:  
I mean you are really really special thats only a saying i dont mean it

Me:   
What colour hair do you have?

Michael:  
What? Thought u didnt want to know?

Me:  
Ik

Michael:   
Bleach blonde

Me:  
A bleach blonde baby. I’ll keep my eye open


End file.
